Any of you who have had the gift of meeting my sister, Taira, you know what I'm talking about. She is so generous, loving, and fun. She helps me when I need it most. Okay, so maybe there's a little co-dependence going on....but it's hard to separate our lives. And I don't want to!
Here is a picture of Taira taken at a baseball game last summer. It was so Taira, the funky hair thing, the mardi gras beads, the big smile....
She is struggling, as I am, to go on with our lives. We poured our heart and soul into the store. It was ours together. And it hurts to see it gone. Did it really matter to anyone but us? I think it did. I want to do a scrapbook about the store, and how it touched other peoples lives. If you want to contribute, let me know. Maybe we'll do one of those books - like a circle journal (wow, almost couldn't remember the name of it anymore).
I got to see Candy, Lynzee, Brianna, Danielle, Christina, Jori, and Sue at Lynzee's wedding on the 18th. It was very bittersweet. I didn't realize how much I missed everyone, and how I was avoiding them to avoid the painful memories. Why can't I focus on the good ones? I cried all over Candy and Brianna, I miss them so much, and I have such mixed emotions when I see them. I feel like I let everyone down. Now I am tearing up again. Will I ever heal from this?
I wish I had pictures of the girls, they were all so beautiful. And Candy was radiant, there's no other word for it. And Lynzee, truly the beautiful, regal princess with her court of ladies. All the beautiful lavender and purple! And the bouquets were gorgeous, I wanted to take one home!
I danced with my husband for the first time in probably 10 years. And had a great time dancing with the girls to "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy". Funny how that song sticks with me, even though it's nasty ole' country music!
I have a real need to reconnect with everyone. I think it's part of getting on with my life. So if you're reading this, leave me a note. I miss you all, and think about you often.
8 comments:
I love mine too! I remember how much it hurts to go through this kind of withdrawal and how hard it is to start connecting again.
Hey, I just tried adding the Bold HTML tag - did it work?
I miss you two SO much!! I miss all the girls! It feels so weird, not having a *home. Sad and Lonesome. I haven't stepped foot into another scrap store since December (for adhesive and cardstock). I just really miss seeing everyone I know. Just the connection. The interaction. The friday nights with *something to do. hehe! I would LOVE to be apart of a CJ. Hugs!!
Alana -
Please don't ever feel like you let us down. Your store created many many friendships that will last a life time. These friendships can NOT be taken from any of us. You need to focus on all the good times and good things that came out of all of this and move forward. We are here for you.
I would love to help with your store scrapbook. Afterall, I was your first employee. hehe
Lets try to get all of us together sometime soon for lunch - dinner - or some scrappin!!
Miss you too!
Jori
Alana-
I miss you so much. You didn't let us down. Please don't ever think that!!!!
I have been wanting to see you guys.
We should have a "re-connecting" scrap. That would be fun!
BTW, I am pregnant! Can you believe it? CRAZY!!!
Lots of love to you and the family.
-Melissa
(please email me, I would love to hear from you)
pcdcards@aol.com
Hi Alana,
I am elated that you had a great time at my wedding. I wish I would have had more time to sit and chat with you...the night of my dreams was over before I knew it.
I miss you and Taira more than you know. I get to see the rest of the "clan" on a daily if not weekly basis, which is nice. I miss Friday nights...getting the new stuff in...Taira throwing scissors at me...balancing the drawer...the list goes on.
You shouldn't feel like you let us down. You did everything in your power to keep "our store" alive. Things happen for a reason, you may not have the store anymore, but you do have more time with your FAMILY, which is the most important thing in life. Family is everything!
All of us were family and somehow we have drifted, but we can get that back by putting the pain behind us and moving on to new (and maybe even better) memories.
I would love to get together for dinner or a scrap. I look forward to it...now that I have more time on my hands maybe I can see what we can pull together in the near future.
I have some pictures that Brianna took at the wedding at home, I will download them and send them to you this evening. They are great. I knew you would love the purples and the ride a horse song...you know you love that song because country ROCKS!!!
Alana... you are one of a kind! I know what you mean about seeing our old 'crew' and I think about the store often. Mostly I think about how much I loved being there... I looked forward to seeing all the girls and our favorite customers. But the thing that sticks out most was that no matter who it was, employee, customer, or friend, no matter how long they were gone and no matter how much time had passed since we'd last seen them, as soon as we got together it was like no time had passed at all. That's really how I felt seeing your family at the wedding. I miss you, Taira, Flo, Sundays with Lynzee, summers with Danielle, inventory with Sue and Sheryl, opening 'magical boxes' with Joni, laughing with Candy, dancing on the counter to THE Country Song at our farewell scrap, and the list goes on and on. But PLEASE don't feel that you ever let us down! Replace that with knowing how many WONDERFUL friendships and memories you helped cultivate by opening the store and making it what it was - none of that could have hapened without YOU! I am DEFINITELY in on the store scrapbook (you mean I might actually have a reason to USE all of those supplies you helped me to 'collect' over 4 years:) and I think getting together more regularly would be an excellent idea. Please let me know if there is anything you need - after all, like Lynzee said, family is everything and I'll always consider myself a member of the Scrappin' Sisters Clan!
LOVE YOU!!!!
Brianna
Hi Alana!!!!
I was so sad to hear that you closed the store too. Total Bummer!!!! I don't know what you have in mind regarding a book... but I would love to contribute. You guys were just the best! I loved being part of your team.... even if it was only for a short time. Let me know what I can do.
And as for some life advise... Change is hard. Loss is hard. Look to the Lord for strength. Find purpose in the center of your heart. And remember... the store as much as it was great... it didn't and doesn't define you. You and your sister are two of the most kind, loving, funny, sweet, generous... I could go on and on. ladies I have ever had the privilage to be associated with. I miss you and your sweet nature and your sisters contagious smile.
Thinking of you way up in Idaho.
(((((Hugs to both of you.... and Mom!)))))
Alana, I only have a few minutes to write, but I couldn't read this without leaving a comment. I miss everyone so so much! It's been great seeing you and Taira at the last 2 weddings. I felt like I was joining a family when I was "able" to start working at the store with everyone, and it was such a neat feeling. I have made so many friends because of the chance that you guys took to open and start a store. That truly became my home away from home (if I wasn't working, I was shopping). I appreciate all that you did...please never feel like you let anyone down, because I know that none of us feel that way. Sorry I didn't make it to the scrap a few weekends ago, I wish I would have. But I hope you do it again, and I am totally in on the store scrapbook. I'll add some of that pink that I am so well-known for. Thanks for everything Alana....I miss you guys! DANI :)
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